10. Your normally loquacious imagination now mumbles "Umm..."
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
10. Your normally loquacious imagination now mumbles "Umm..."
Monday, May 30, 2011
Most of us try to make a good first impression - we check our clothes for stains, ensure we're wearing matching shoes, maybe even practice a few phrases. Good first impressions pave the way to second impressions; and after that, the sky's the limit!
- The reader may not necessarily be meeting him/her at their finest moment (or maybe they are) but it is a moment that will demonstrate one of the character's priorities.
- There something intrinsically likable (in my opinion) about my main characters. People want to learn more about people they like or can identify with in some way. It might the situation the character finds themselves in, it might be their background, it might be their love of shoes - but there's something that makes the reader want to read on.
- No character makes the same first impression as another. My logic is the reader is just getting to know these people - I try to keep it as easy as possible!
- I will not introduce a continuing character in a way that harks back to a previous event in an earlier story. The reader may not know the event and will start off feeling that they're missing something. That's just mean.
- I'll always choose dialogue over description.
Friday, May 27, 2011
Welcome to Fun Friday. Here's a selection of puns to make you smile - or groan.
Have a great weekend!
Those who jump off a bridge in
A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.
Practice safe eating - always use condiments.
Shotgun wedding - A case of wife or death.
A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy.
A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play.
Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.
A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two tired.
What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead give away.)
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes.
She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off.
A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed
With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.
The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.
You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
Local Area Network in
Every calendar's days are numbered.
A lot of money is tainted - Taint yours and taint mine.
A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.
He had a photographic memory that was never developed.
A midget fortune-teller who escapes from prison is a small medium at large.
Once you've seen one shopping centre, you've seen a mall.
Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.
Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
Acupuncture is a jab well done.
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
You woke up with that feeling...today you will write and you will write well.
Monday, May 23, 2011
Here in Canada, it's the first long weekend of summer. Celebrated on the closest Monday to May 24th, this holiday is named for Queen Victoria, who was the monarch when Canada became a nation rather than a colony back in 1867.
Traditionally, Victoria Day weekend is the time when Canadians plant out their gardens and head out for the first weekend of camping. I'm not traditional.
Here are a few pieces of trivia about Victorian life. Enjoy.
When a woman entered a room, it was considered rude for a man to offer his seat to her because the cushion might still be warm.
The Victorian era was a period of extravagant entertaining for the upper middle and high classes. Victorian meals consisted of as many as nine courses, although many dishes were light and petite-sized. Fine ingredients, such as exotic spices imported from distant countries, were used in lavishly prepared meals. Detailed measurements and instructions were written down for the first time during this era. New kitchen gadgets such as the can-opener and Ball-Mason jars were introducted. In addition, Victorians began adopting a host of manners and customs surrounding mealtime, in accordance with Beeton's maxim: "A place for everything and everything in its place."
The institution of afternoon tea became highly popular during the Victorian era. Afternoon tea was invented by Anna Duchess of Bedford (1783-1857), one of Queen Victoria's ladies-in-waiting. During this time, the noble classes ate large breakfasts, small lunches and late suppers. Every afternoon, Anna reportedly experienced what she referred to as a "sinking feeling," so she requested that her servants bring her tea and petite-sized cakes to her boudoir. Many followed the Duchess' lead, and thus the ritual of afternoon tea began. Fine hotels began to offer tea rooms, while tea shops opened for the general public. Tea dances also became popular social events at which Victorian ladies met potential husbands.
Friday, May 20, 2011
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Monday, May 16, 2011
Other writing blogs will give you tips on how to improve your writing. How to develop your characters. How to muscle on through to the end. How to be productive.
Friday, May 13, 2011
1. "I think it should be explained in the brochure that the local store does not sell proper biscuits like custard creams or ginger nuts."
2. "It's lazy of the local shopkeepers to close in the afternoons. I often needed to buy things during 'siesta' time - this should be banned.
3. "On my holiday to Goa in India, I was disgusted to find that almost every restaurant served curry. I don't like spicy food at all."
4. "We booked an excursion to a water park but no-one told us we had to bring our swimming costumes and towels."
5. A tourist at a top African game lodge over looking a water hole, who spotted a visibly aroused elephant, complained that the sight of this rampant beast ruined his honeymoon by making him feel "inadequate".
6. A woman threatened to call police after claiming that she'd been locked in by staff. When in fact, she had mistaken the "do not disturb" sign on the back of the door as a warning to remain in the room.
7. "The beach was too sandy."
8. "We found the sand was not like the sand in the brochure. Your brochure shows the sand as yellow but it was white."
9. A guest at a Novotel in Australia complained his soup was too thick and strong. He was inadvertently slurping the gravy at the time.
10. "Topless sunbathing on the beach should be banned. The holiday was ruined as my husband spent all day looking at other women."
11. "We bought' Ray-Ban' sunglasses for five Euros (£3.50) from a street trader, only to find out they were fake."
12. "No-one told us there would be fish in the sea. The children were startled."
13. "There was no egg slicer in the apartment..."
14. "We went on holiday to Spain and had a problem with the taxi drivers as they were all Spanish..."
15. "The roads were uneven.."
16. "It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England it only took the Americans three hours to get home."
17. "I compared the size of our one-bedroom apartment to our friends' three-bedroom apartment and ours was significantly smaller."
18. "The brochure stated: 'No hairdressers at the accommodation'. We're trainee hairdressers - will we be OK staying here?"
19. "There are too many Spanish people. The receptionist speaks Spanish. The food is Spanish. Too many foreigners."
20. "We had to queue outside with no air conditioning."
21. "It is your duty as a tour operator to advise us of noisy or unruly guests before we travel."
22. "I was bitten by a mosquito - no-one said they could bite."
23. "My fiancé and I booked a twin-bedded room but we were placed in a double-bedded room. We now hold you responsible for the fact that I find myself pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us in the room that we booked."
Thursday, May 12, 2011
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
10. It's okay that it's really rough because it's only the first (second, third, forty-seventh) draft.