Tuesday, April 26, 2011

10 Reasons I Can't Write Right Now

10. The coffee pot is empty. Lives will be lost.

9. I have to check my emails. Perhaps that mega agent has emailed me out of the blue. You never know. We've tweeted. That's the first step.

8. I have to visit my favourite blogs and leave comments. It's part of my pre-writing routine. Pre-writing. I'll write once I've done the pre-writing. It's a warm-up. Yeah. That sounds good.

7. Two words: No. Chocolate.

6. I need to know the meanings of the names of all my characters. All of them. Ignorance leads to messy writing.

5. Now I have to change the names of most of my characters. Sometimes ignorance is bliss.

4. The cat just shrieked and raced from the room. What does he know that I don't? Do I want to know? Was there just a creak behind me?

3. I just have a bit of research to do before getting down to writing. The clock on the computer must be wrong. How did two hours go by so quickly?

2. I'm going to emulate the behaviour of a favourite writer and read a chapter from a good book. Crap. I'll never write as well as that. Bring on the chocolate.

1. See #7.


  1. Do you think cats are just playing with our heads when they do these things? Mine sometimes sit with huge eyes and fur on end just to freak me out, I think.

    LOTS of chocolate here...but it's the children's Easter candy. I'm thinking about eating it anyway...

  2. Ha! I think that sounds a little like my writing style! Plus four kids... throw in a kid needing a new diaper or some food or or or... yeah. It's amazing anything gets done! And, and trade out some Pepsi for the chocolate. Happy writing! :)

  3. Brilliant list! Applies to all sorts of different types of writing. I would have to add:
    0. See #1
    -1. See #1
    -2. See #1

    #1 is by far my biggest barrier to getting anything done!

  4. You just described me! We writers are so weird. Why we do those things?

  5. Elspeth - Those are excellent and convincing reasons not to write. Especially #10 and #7. Oh, and for me, there is also the imminent world takeover by pets if I don't interrupt and tend to their needs...

  6. Elizabeth; There's chocolate here too - but it's the kids. I can't eat it; I have guilt. I'll never understand cats. I think they have a complete agenda, but I just don't know what it is. Unsettling.

    Marcy; You've got 4 kids at home and still manage to write? You're my hero.

    Juliette; HA! Thanks for taking the time to leave a comment to let me know you liked my post.

    Natalie; I don't know. I guess we just have to embrace our weirdness and move on.

    Margot; Pets can be tiny dictators, can't they? But, what would we do without them?

  7. I so needed this laugh before I start my 3-day marathon of conferencing and last-minute-last-week-of-classes brain-frying. To say nothing of the grading.

    Now, where did I put those pop tarts?

  8. Oh my, you were obviously visiting my office today. I did everything except writing. Tomorrow I'll be better.

  9. Lauri; After all, tomorrow is another day! (you'll have to imagine the southern accent)

  10. Pre-writing ... so true ... and here I am. Late, but here!

    Terry's Place
    Romance with a Twist--of Mystery


Please leave a comment as I love to hear from you!