Thursday, May 27, 2010

10 Writing Mysteries



10. Why do the snappiest snippets of dialogue always pop into my head as I'm dropping off to sleep? I've tried keeping the trusty pad of paper next to the bed. The dialogue dissolves as the first bit of ink sinks into the paper.

9. Why isn't my writing as polished on the page as it is in my head? Obviously, I have a leak between my brain and my fingers. Drastic measures may be necessary.

8. Why didn't I include a lovable monster in my plot? No, I'm not writing a fantasy. What's your point?

7. Why can't my self-editor ever go on holiday? I'll pay. Seriously.

6. Why is it when I have hours in which to write the writing refuses to come, but when I'm busy doing something else, I'm writing constantly in my head? Do these pieces get written down? See question #10.

5. Why hasn't someone invented the 'instant book' pill? Take this pill with the beverage of your choice (hint: wine is always good). Type.

4. Why isn't there a National Writing Day? Note: This is not a day for writing, but a day where writers are taken out for lunch and worshiped generally. A little worship never hurt anyone. Maybe a small statue.

3. When I tell people that I write mysteries, why is their usual reaction to widen their eyes, do a head tilt and make that high-pitched 'really?' sound? It's FICTION, people. I'm not going to pull out a gun or thrust poison down your throat. At least, not here.

2. Why do good-writing days only last for a day? What about the good-writing week? Or month? Note: If you enjoy this type of week or month, it's safest not to share this information. See question #3.

1. Why, even though I have all these questions, do I continue to write? Accept it and move on.

17 comments:

  1. No matter how my day is going getting a blog update from you makes it even better.
    #5 is my favorite. With enough wine it would all look good to me -- that day any way!

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  2. Maribeth; I raise a glass in your direction and thank you for your very kind words.

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  3. Excellent. I am #9 and #2. Make it #2 and #9. 29 sounds much better than 92.

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  4. Try telling them you write romantic suspense. They never want to know if you "test" your murder methods, only if you "test" the sex scenes.

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  5. Carol; It does sound better. 29 it is.

    Terry; What an excellent suggestion which could lead to fascinating and yet awkward conversations. Thanks!

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  6. Karen; It's a mystery! (Why does that sound familiar?) Seriously, it can be frustrating, can't it? It would be much easier to be creative on demand.

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  7. Elspeth - I love those questions!! I ask them of myself all the time. Well, except the lovable monster one; I love your creativity on that one! I also ask myself: When I tell people I write, why do they always say that smarmy "Oh, how nice," as though writing were a lark. It's not!!!! It's hard work, people!

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  8. Margot; It never ceases to amaze me how many people think writing is easy. Perhaps it is for some, the lucky so and sos. I curse I can't insert a lovable monster into my plot - something fuzzy with big teeth and long eyelashes.

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  9. That's so funny. I love that I get asked the same things. I write about murder so I must have committed one.

    CD

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  10. The last few days I've had tons of great ideas pop into my head, usually as I'm falling asleep. Thank goodness for Post-Its!

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  11. Hmmmm. A loveable monster and a writer idol. I may have solved a plot problem in my upcoming story....

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  12. Clarissa; It's an odd thing for people to assume, isn't it? There is such a thing as imagination - albeit somewhat twisted.

    Stephanie; I'm glad you're able to get your ideas down on paper. I'm sure you're writing a magnificent tale.

    Daring Novelist; I'm glad to have helped. I'm cursing I can't fit a cuddly monster into my story. Maybe if I think about it a wee bit more...

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  13. It is very mysterious, that's for sure. I especially like #1.

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  14. Oh yah? Try being a psychotherapist if you want nervousness around you. I'd rather tell people I'm a writer...I'd rather people be scared than tell you that they 'have a book in them'. Best get it out - could cause complications. Or "oh, I'm going to quit my job as a doctor and write novels one day". Oh yah, well I'm going to stop writing and take up surgury!

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  15. Patricia; The mystery continues...

    Jan; I'm not surprised you get wary looksl. A writer and a psychotherapist is rather a lethal combination.

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  16. Good list! At least #3 will provide you with lots of victims and motives for future stories! Of course the ideas will come to you just as you're dropping off... :)

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  17. 1. Why, even though all I have ever made is $ 3 do I continue to write?

    Well, my dedication must surely prove it is my vocation :D

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