The Return of the Sheep

Guardian: Welcome back to the writer's brain. I thought I wouldn't be seeing you again.

Sheep #1: We like it here.

Sheep #2: It's comfy.

Sheep #3: And there's food.

Guardian: But you're just standing there. Flocking. Why aren't you continuing along the road? I know the end of your journey is up at the top of that mountain on the horizon.

Sheep: #1: That's an awfully long way. Our hooves will get scuffed.

Sheep #2: We've very proud of our appearance. Scuffed hooves are humiliating.

Guardian: That's what's stopping you from moving? The fear of scuffed hooves?

Sheep #1: No, of course not. That was an example of our dry wit.

Sheep #2: We're very dry.

Sheep #3: No, it's the writer. She's in the middle. Look that way. (points delicately to the left) See that mountain? That was the beginning of the plot. We've been there.

Sheep #1: We've got tee shirts.

Sheep #2: That mountain over there (points gracefully to the right) is the end.

Sheep #3: This valley? This verdant, lush valley with plenty of grass and wonderful trees affording dappled shade? This, my friend is the middle. However...look out!

Sheep #1: Damn.

Guardian: What is it?

Sheep #1: Mud puddle. There's mud everywhere. That's the irony of the middle. The hidden menace, if you will. It's so easy to get stuck.

Guardian: Is that the writer's problem right now?

Sheep #1: When you're in the middle you can start to see the end, which is encouraging, of course. She's been wanting to get to the end for a long time. But then she's realizing all the things which must be accomplished in the middle. Look!

Guardian: It's another tree affording dappled shade. That's new.

Sheep #2: The writer has just remembered another step she has to take with one of the sub-plots. There's a myriad of sub-plots.

Sheep #3: We could be here a while.

Guardian: But look over there! If you continue through this valley and head toward the foot of End Mountain there appears to be a cooling pond.

Sheep #1: It does look pleasant.

Sheep #2: And refreshing.

Sheep #3: Okay, we'll keep going. Time to get through the middle and get to the end. The end. I've heard it's a wonderful place.

Guardian: I'll see you there.

Sheep #1: Don't forget the tee shirts.

Voice

Every writer is exhorted to 'find their voice'. Don't imitate anyone else, we are told, write like you.

Okay, this makes sense. I am able to write with other writers' rhythms (I've got one mystery game that is very Jane Austen...on purpose), but it's easiest to write like me.

But never forget, each of our characters must have their own voice as well. Not ours; theirs.

Each character is in your manuscript for a reason. (if there isn't a reason, then maybe you should rethink them - but that's a whole different post). Give them their own voice. Their own rhythm. Their own vocabulary.

I've found this a wonderful tool for enabling each character to stand out beyond any description of their physical appearance or habits. I have one character who speaks in very short sentences. Another who has a rather dry sense of humour. One who is terrified of making a social faux pas and therefore picks his words with extreme care.

The better you know your characters the clearer their voice becomes. What is their level of education? Where did they grow up? What's the level of their self-esteem? The latter is very useful when it comes to vocabulary choices. A confident character will say what they wish; a less confident character will try to please. Some characters will take joy in shocking others and their language will reflect this. Do you have a character where English is their second language and if so, how fluent are they? Don't take the obvious road, it could be fun if this character actually has a better vocabulary than some others. Confound the stereotype.

Take a look at whatever project you're working on right now and just look at the dialogue. Can you instantly tell which character is talking? More importantly; could someone else?

Remember: although all these characters sprang from your brain, they're not you. Give them their own voice.

Inspirations

Inspirations materialize in a myriad of guises. It could be a memory from school. It could be the odd woman in the grocery store. It could be a newspaper article. It could be a piece of art. Every time it's unique.

To aid in all of your inspirations, here's a few quotes to get your minds working and a few in celebration of all of you that write.

I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love.

Mother Teresa

Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind,

And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind.

William Shakespeare

Most people would succeed in small things if they were not troubled with great ambitions.

William Wadsworth Longfellow

JJust be wrong. Just stand there in your wrongness and be wrong and get used to it.

Aaron Sorkin

Substitute "damn" every time you're inclined to write "very;" your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.

Mark Twain

I'm not a very good writer, but I'm an excellent rewriter.

James Michener

Don't tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of light on broken glass.

Anton Chekhov

Have a wonderful day.

Thoughts From the Voyage

As I continue my voyage through my first draft, I thought I'd share some of the discoveries I've made on my sojourn. I offer these to you in the hopes that as you travel through your own drafts you avoid this mishaps (or at least are gently reminded they're out there...lurking).

Talking Heads: This is, by far, my biggest problem. Since dialogue comes very easily to me, I tend to go on and on and not fill in the needed details. I have a distressingly large amount of sections that are simply two or three people talking, or sniping, or cooing. Beware the talking head. I plan on going through all these conversations and discover what these characters can be doing, besides just being talkative.

Word Repetition: Another bugaboo for me. I've noticed during different sections that I seem to fall in love with certain words. These words litter the pages in distressingly large amounts and then disappear to be followed by the new favorite. Then there's the whole other issue with nasty little words like 'just' or 'that'. Purging will commence later.

Leaps of Logic: Luckily, I've only come across this nasty issue once, but the discovery was somewhat heart-stopping. I believe it came from me knowing so much about these characters and plots and forgetting my reader would not. More explanations were needed; a slower pace introduced.

I am not worrying about chapter breaks. Right now, it's just one big chapter. I'm not paying too much attention to word counts (but, seriously, how can you not?). I'm trying to drop clues in different disguises; some oral, some material, some inferred. I'm very conscious every character has their own voice with their own rhythm. I very aware of whose PoV is being used and therefore, what they can know or think and what they can't.

The voyage continues.

What hiccups have you encountered on your voyages?

By the way, I send warm and grateful thanks to all of you who left encouraging thoughts and wishes on my Friday post. They made me smile. Smiles are always good.

Just Keep Writing

Quick post today to say I haven't time to post! I'm channelling my inner Dory "Just keep writing, writing, writing,..."

It's going well. (knock on wood) I mutter a great deal "fix it later, fix it later" and I forgive myself instantly for not coming up with the perfect word. I can...fix it later.

I'm now at that part of the draft when my biggest worry isn't how many words I have left to write but rather how many words I have left if I want this manuscript to fall within acceptable parameters.

Anyway...

Just keep writing, writing, writing...

Think of me.

Lessons I Have Learned

I enjoy writing. I've always enjoyed writing; except for writing exams back in school and some of those assigned essays were monsters. But as I continue along this road and (hopefully) improve in my craft, I have learned several valuable lessons. I'm sure most of you know these already, but reminders never hurt. Right?

Patience: So easy to preach, so tricky to put into practice. I've learned writing takes time. It takes time to get the initial 'aha' moment, time to come up with the characters and even more time to name them correctly. It takes time to write. And re-write. And edit. It doesn't happen overnight and everyone works at their own pace. However, you must have buckets of...

Self-Discipline: When you don't have anyone literally hanging over you screaming "Is it done??" it takes self-discipline to sit yourself down and start tapping away. After all, you can say to yourself, who'll know if I don't write today? I can make it up tomorrow. I'm fine. It's a slippery slope. Deadlines are real and unless you want to pull a few all-nighters, I don't recommend putting off writing for too long. Another demon that is tricky to conquer is...

Perfectionism: I want my writing to be as good as it can be, but I've learned it's not going to be perfect right from the beginning. I'm learning to silence this demon and tell it I'll get to it later. The issue here can be that many writers are never satisfied and spend their lives in a never-ending whirlpool of editing. At some point, you have to say it's done. But the biggest lesson I've learned is...

Self-Trust: You have to trust yourself that the ideas will come. You have to trust the right word will eventually present itself. You have to trust your plot is good and your characters are engaging. You have to trust (or believe) you're not wasting your time. This is a tough lesson; or at least it is for me. I'm getting there. Slowly.

What lessons have you learned? What have you mastered and what are you still struggling with?

Rules of Play

Every story has a plot. Boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy gets girl. Hero saves the world from multi-flippered aliens. Murder committed, murder solved. One thing every plot has in common is it has to make sense. Logic is key.

Of course, you can have colourful characters gamboling about. Of course you can have unusual situations (Why is Auntie Marge up in the tree? Again?) You can have talking animals. Every writer creates their own world, but that world has rules. It can't be anything goes.

One of the issues any mystery writer must tussle with is "How hard am I going to make this?" Is this mystery long on humour but short on plot? Many mysteries are so populated with quirky characters that it's easy for the actual mystery to be fairly light. Yes, Cyril got killed, but he was a nasty old thing. No one liked him. He was mean to Little Johnny and he kicked his cat. Sure, let's solve the mystery, but in the meantime, would you like some pie?

Then there are the mysteries with multiple sub-plots and myriads of suspects. Larger issues are examined. World events can come into play. Both characters and plots are far more complex. Was the victim killed because of his personal life (he'd just left his wife, who is far from pleased), professional life (he was a major player in industry and had political ambitions), or is it something else entirely? Not much pie in these books.

The answer to "How hard am I going to make this?" depends on the writer. But it must make sense. There must be clues, be they physical or not. When the solution is revealed, it has to make sense and any reader could go back through the story picking up each of the threads that lead to the conclusion.

Personally, I can't stand reading mysteries and having all vital information revealed by the oh-so-clever sleuth in the final moments. Give me a chance to figure it out. Don't make it so easy that I figured it out before I hit the halfway mark, but let me see the logic of the solution. I don't mind feeling stupid, but I do mind not being allowed to play.

Remember your rules of play. There are absolutes, no matter what type of fantastic world you're living in. Have fun? Absolutely. But remember that reader. You don't want them scratching their heads at the ending. That's just not fair.

Let's Start at the very Beginning...*

It's time. New project time. It might be a short story, a novella or a novel, but you're about to dive into the pool. How do you approach that first draft?

Write now, fix later: This is what I call the approach of just throwing it down on the page. The main goal is to get to the end as quickly as possible. Sure, you'll have to add details; perhaps a great many details, but you've got a completed first draft, lean as it may be.

Watch the movie, write it down: This is a method used by many writers; they see their story being acted out in front of them and they simply write down what they see. If you're incredibly visual then this may be the method that works best for you.

Hop, skip and a jump: This is my name for the method of writing what appeals to you today. Maybe it's the ending. Maybe it's a climatic fight or a hair-raising escape. Perhaps it's a love scene. This method will give you a first draft but you'll need some time to put the puzzle together. If you're of the school of 'going with your feelings' then this may be the method for you.

Every word is golden: This is my name for the method of starting at the beginning and moving slowly to the end. Word choices are seriously considered. Consistency is prized. The advantage of this method is far less editing will probably be required. The disadvantage of this method is its speed. There isn't any.

Of course, every writer has their own method of battling that first (or subsequent) draft to the ground. Some stick to what has worked in the past, others are constantly adjusting their approach. When it comes to the finish line and you've a completed manuscript ready for your agent, no one is going to care how you got there. You're there and that's what counts.

*Did today's post title give you the urge to re-watch "The Sound of Music"? I thought it might...

Time

When we were little, time took longer. It did. Summer vacations lasted forever. Next week was far away. Next month almost unimaginable. We knew we would grow up one day; I can remember figuring out with my friends how old we would be in 2000. But the age seemed unreal. It was simply too far in the future.

I've discovered over my years as a mother, summer vacations also seem to last forever, albeit now, for slightly different reasons.

Now time seems to pass too quickly. How did it become Friday already? Where did last week go? Another year gone by again? For me, this is sad, but true.

When I write is when I've become aware how truly elastic time can be. I look at the clock before I start as I've got children to pick up from school, household errands, chores, etc. Time seems to stay on its regular course as I go through my pre-writing rituals. But when I actually open up the document and start tapping away? (or swearing, depending on my mood) Where does the time go? Suddenly it's an hour later. Or two. I can always tell when (and if) I hit the three hour mark because that's when my brain starts to fry.

I've read blogs or facebook updates or whatever where writers write 'I wrote for 8 hours today'. This always makes me feel very small and somewhat of a pretender. I've never written for that long. Ever. Not even finals were that long. How is this possible? I can get my head around working on my present project for long periods, but not actually writing the whole time. My words would become gobbledegook. My sentence structure would go flying out the window. I know I'd start writing things which amuse the heck out of me, but have absolutely no place in my plot. And then, delete, delete, delete.

I'm sure there are writers out there that can tap away or write away until their fingers bleed. I'm not one of them. Maybe this makes me a poor writer, maybe not. I consider it a triumph just to actually open the document and add to it. Everyone has their own routines. Some people only write on Saturdays. Some add a bit every day. But everyone's 'bit' is different. Is it a chapter? Ten chapters? A paragraph? Is it for as long as you have 'time'?

I just wish time would pass as swiftly when I'm washing the dishes. But no. That time passes as slowly as if I were still little. Proof, I suppose, that time has a sense of humour.

How is your relationship with time?

First Friday

It's the first Friday of a New Year. Resolutions are either being kept or have been abandoned alongside the trash can waiting for pick up. The decorations are put away, the baking is eaten, the turkey destroyed. Time for fun!

Let's imagine, just for a moment, that you have all the money you've ever wanted. What would you do? Now, let's be clear, this is for you. Altruistic tendencies must be avoided for this exercise. This is just fun. Let your mind unwind and soar.

As for me...

Travel: I have often told those near and dear to me that if I had the funds they couldn't see me in the mist of jet fuel. I love traveling and I haven't been able to do it for a long time. I'm back in Europe! I'm in England and then, (if I can pry myself away) I'm in France and Italy. A cruise around the Greek Islands doesn't sound too bad.

Houses: I realized a while ago that if I had loads of money, I'd collect houses like others collect stamps. Now, it doesn't have to be a house; there are some places I'd be perfectly happy with a condo. Give me a flat in London looking out on the Thames where I can see Tower Bridge. But I also crave a cottage in Warwickshire (close enough to Stratford), that is so old Elizabeth I could have seen it. Give me an old villa in Tuscany and an apartment in Venice. A cottage in Provence. A farmhouse in the Okanagan where my family has vacationed for the last few years. (this year's post here). I could go on and on and on...

Renovations: The house we're in now gets a complete overhaul. New bathroom. New kitchen. New flooring. New bedrooms. (more books....)

Shoes: For once in my life, I want a pair of designer shoes. I want a pair of Manolo Blahniks or Jimmy Choos. I know it's frivolous. I know I don't have the lifestyle these shoes should have. I don't care. I want them.

I could go on, but I don't want to appear too shallow! How about you? Imagine you've just won the mother of all lotteries. Indulge yourself. It's Friday!

Making it Count

Achievement. Everyone has a different concept of its meaning. For some, it's a shiny trophy. For others, it's financial independence. For some, it's recognition by their peers. Whatever your definition of achievement is, it also seems to be understood that you worked to get there. It wasn't handed to you on a silver platter. It took time, tears and sweat.

Why is it we pay little attention to achievements that have come easily? Don't they count? I'm facing this dilemma right now as I'm enjoying rather pleasant numbers in my mystery game sales. I should be over the moon, but I'm not. Why? (you may very well ask). The reason is because I find my games incredibly easy to write. I can ( and have) started a new game on a Monday and sent it to my editor before the week was out. They're a piece of cake. Consequently, when my sales go well, I rather pooh-pooh the results because achievement shouldn't come this easily.

Throughout childhood and adolescence we're (or I was) taught conflicting lessons. On the one hand we're told our best is good enough. No, you didn't win the race, little Johnny, but you tried really hard! Good for you. On the other hand, we're told finish first. Reach your potential. If it's too easy, then try something harder. Easy stuff doesn't count.

I'm sure this is why I've moved on to writing (or attempting to write) actual novels. Yes, plots and characters still come easily to me, but the actual writing? It's hard. It's hard because I want it to be good, but also because it takes time. It takes dedication. I have to really want it. Therefore, if I achieve success with this, it counts. Heck, right now I'd declare victory if I could finish the draft! (no, I wouldn't really, but I would be very very pleased).

When I plan my plots I want them to be tricky, but sensible. When the solution is revealed I want people to say "of course!", but not to have figured it out pages and pages before hand. All the clues have to be there, but they're not lying out in plain sight. It should take some work. I want people to have a sense of achievement if they do figure it out. I know I'm disappointed as a reader if I unmask the guilty party less than a quarter of the way through the book. Where's the fun if it's too easy?

I'm writing this manuscript because it is hard. It is taking work. Every day I get a little bit closer to being able to pat myself on the back. I'll pay attention to this, because it isn't too easy. But trophies are nice, too. I'll keep practicing my "I'd like to thank the Academy..." after all, a girl can dream, can't she?

Do easy achievements count? What counts for you?

Who The Heck Are YOU??

I prepare before I write. I do. I know my setting. I know my history. Plot-wise, I know the identity of the victim. I know the identity of the killer. I know all the suspects' motives. I know who's good and who has evil lurking in their heart. I know, gosh-darn-it.

And then you start writing, and everything changes.

I've got characters turning on me left, right and center. These people are getting so persnickety they're barely talking to each other. Veiled comments are being made. Arms are being crossed. People are getting up and stalking out of rooms. Others are sneaking around opening doors and seeing what's going on inside. Some are stirring up trouble just for fun. For fun! I'm dealing with rabble rousers. I have no control.

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm pleased as punch my many varmints are exhibiting different sides to their personalities, no one is all good or all bad in real life after all. But when you've done your preparation, I don't think it's too much to assume at least a few characters will act as expected.

My main plot and all my sub plots haven't changed. On that side of the playground things are ticking along just fine. But these characters! They need to behave.

I am appreciating the irony that the one character who isn't giving me grief is my killer. A well-behaved murderer. Who knew?

I'm sure as I continue they'll keep on doing the unexpected. That's fine. That's good. At least now, I'm prepared.

Has this happened to you? Are you master of the playground? Or do your characters too, insist on doing and saying what they want?

Good Enough...Isn't

I'm not a perfectionist. Truly. I don't scream if my spices aren't alphabetized or if someone changes the order of how the cds line up. I don't vacuum everyday. (Although that just may make me a sloppy housekeeper.) I don't hit the roof if my kids' bedrooms aren't magazine-perfect. But when it comes to my writing? This is when my heavily cloaked perfectionist pulls off her hood, opens her mouth and screams at the top of her lungs. It's somewhat off-putting.

When I was still running my theatre company, we had a motto: Good enough isn't good enough. This applied to everything; the sets, the costumes, the music, not to mention (let's hope) the acting and the directing. This motto seems engraved on my soul and I've realized its reverberations are what's holding me back from finishing my manuscript.

I've read so much from so many of you about finishing that first draft and worrying about the mess later. First drafts are supposed to be ugly; that's why they're the first drafts and not the final drafts. Intellectually, I understand this. Putting it into practice is something else entirely.

To my credit, I am taking baby steps. Writing which would have perished under the almighty power of the delete key (bless its heart) now sits unsullied. I'll get to it later, on the second go-through. I'm beginning to forgive myself for not writing perfectly immediately. Beginning. I so desperately want this manuscript to be good that I want it good right now. I want to be able to read my pages and have the urge to pat myself on the back, not the urge to slam my head through the wall.

I like writing this manuscript. I like my plots and my characters. I like that it's a challenge. I do not like not meeting my own expectations. I refuse to lower them, so I'm learning to have patience.

This first draft is the first rehearsal. No one expects an opening night performance at the first rehearsal (or they shouldn't anyway!) Good enough isn't good enough. Words to aspire to. Let's see how I feel when I get to the final dress rehearsal. I'm hoping my motto will be well-served.

New Year, New Business

Here we are, 2010. Where does the time go? I remember New Year's Eve 1999 very clearly. The years seem to go by in a blur. It's somewhat disconcerting.

Digression: Are you calling 2010 'twenty ten' or 'two thousand and ten'? This seems to be a matter of great discussion. Around here, because our Olympics (39 days away) have always been referred to as 'Vancouver twenty ten', the former seems to be the choice. However, 2011 is referred to as 'two thousand eleven'. Very odd.

New Business: I am determined to finish my WIP by the end of February. Determined, I say. I'm trying very hard to take the excellent advice I've gotten from many of you and not worry so much about getting it exactly perfect from the get-go. I'm going to just write and finish the **##ed thing and get it perfect after. Now that I've announced my deadline, I'm hoping fear of public humiliation will serve as a much-needed impetus. I'm keeping Alan Orloff's brilliant acronym in mind: BICHOK (butt in chair, hands on keyboard).

I was also honored to received the "Honest Scrap" award from Michele Emrath of Southern City Mysteries over the holidays. Thank you Michele! In accordance with the rules I shall now share 10 things about me.

1. I have 6 children; 5 girls and 1 boy with an age range of 14 years between oldest and youngest. Don't panic, the eldest three no longer live at home.

2. I attended an all-girl private school.

3. I must have my cup of tea every afternoon.

4. I'm always reading at least one book (sometimes more). I fluctuate between books that involve serious thinking and books that are just fun. (the latter include books by the wonderful Peter Mayle and P.G. Woodhouse).

5. I am a huge contradiction; I'm very shy by nature, but also am happiest being the leader of a group. (it helps I'm a Gemini).

6. I used to be fairly good at gymnastics. I'm confident if I tried any of those moves now, I would break.

7. I studied ballet for many years.

8. I still have my old toe shoes and can still go en pointe.

9. In high school I was a successful debater. I represented my province at the Western Canada Championships and the National Championships.

10. I adore champagne. A lot. It's scary.

I'm not going to pass on the award right now, although I reserve the right to pass it on at a future time.

I'm now going to do my blog tour and read all of your wonderful posts before bringing up my manuscript and continuing to plough through. What is your new business for this new year?

Ruthlessness with Discards

For many, this time of year reverberates to the clash of the garbage lid while the sweet aroma of cleaning liquid dances in your nose. 'Tis the year end, time to clean house.

Time to wonder 'when on earth did I buy this?' or look once again at the gosh-awful present Great Aunt Gertrude gave you years ago and wonder if this is the year you'll be able to get over the guilt and just get rid of it.

It's also the time for rediscoveries (sometimes just after the nick of time). There's the white sock that's been missing since Easter. There's your other earring. Perhaps, even, there's the cat. It is the time of year to take stock and bravely move forward into a new year (like you have a choice; unless you want to do your best Miss Havisham impression).

Time to take stock of your writing projects as well. Take an inventory. Decide (honestly) which are worth keeping around and which should go to that big editing room in the sky. Maybe you could send it to that farm in the country where it could play with all the other unfinished projects. There's no point in holding on to things just for the sake of holding on to them. There's only so much room in that desk drawer, or under your bed, or behind the furnace.

Be aware of your facial expressions. If seeing the project makes you smile, then keep it. If you emit a frustrated sigh at the sight of it, let it go. Why would you keep something that makes you feel bad? And no, guilt, isn't the right answer. Not by a long shot.

Be ruthless with your discards. Your living space will be cleaner and so will be your writing.

I'm taking tomorrow and Friday off so I can follow my own advice and be ruthless with discards. Best wishes to all for a safe and happy New Year's.

The Little Things

The end of every year is always a time of reflection and anticipation. Each time it rolls around, (every year it seems to come faster) I try to remind myself to take comfort in the little things as well as the large. Not living the life of the rich and famous, I don't have a life crowded with massive accomplishments earning me plaudits from millions. I try to remember the small triumphs: dinner was on the table every night of the year. My kids are bringing home exceptional report cards, you can see the floor in the living room (okay, in patches. But it's there).

It's the same thing when I'm writing. Although the joy of finishing a draft is magnificent, there's also the pleasure of finishing a chapter or a scene. There's the thrill of writing an especially good piece of dialogue or finding exactly the right word to describe the crispness of fresh linen sheets (or whatever).

Huge accomplishments are fantastic; but what constitutes 'huge' varies from person to person. To one writer, nothing counts except their book being atop the New York Times bestseller list. For another, it's holding a copy of their book for the first time. For yet another, it's triumphantly tapping out that last sentence in that seemingly never-ending first draft.

When I write, I try to focus on the small steps on my way to my destination. I cheerfully admit this may simply be an act of self-preservation; as I've noted in previous posts this year, I'm not the Speed Racer of writers. I'm pleased when I come up with a new plot twist, when my characters start evolving into real people, when I see my word count is actually increasing. Some days I'm pleased to finish one sentence (okay, that's rare, 'cause it's sad).

Look around you. Pat yourself on the back for all the little things you've accomplished. Certainly, large events are deserving of massive applause, but remember all the little steps it took to get yourself there.

You sat down. You wrote. You won.

Holiday Musings

Yes, tremble in your chairs....I'm back.

I hope all of you had a lovely holiday and if you're still celebrating, I tip my party hat in admiration. Everyone who shares a roof with me captured magnificent treasure under the tree. My teenage son's voice actually quavered as he unwrapped his ipod touch. My 12 year old went into paroxysms of joy when she discovered a Wii game system. As for me? I now sport diamond solitaire earrings, thank you very much. All in all, all were satisfied.

I received another gift yesterday from Margot Kinberg, when she kindly included me in her list of "Inspiring Crime and Mystery Fiction Writing and Writers' Blogs". Look at this lovely award!

My thanks to Margot; and I encourage all of you to check out her blog Confessions of a Mystery Novelist, her knowledge and analysis of the mystery genre is truly astounding.

I've written a little over the past week, but I'm getting antsy to finish this draft. I'm hoping once the holidays are truly done, the tree put out for compost, the decorations packed away and the baking eaten I'll be able to concentrate and plow on to the finish.

All kidding aside, it's great to be back. I was surprised how much not writing these posts fidgeted me. Leave a comment and tell me about how you've spent the last few days. Were there presents? Or was there a movie and Chinese food?

Holiday Stretch

Here's a fun stretch for your imagination as the holiday season turns up its engine. How would your main characters spend the holidays?

Where would they be? Who else would be there? Would it be a large occasion or small?

My detective would be in the south of France. He would have his Christmas dinner at one of the town's fine cafes. His present of choice? New water colour paints.

With this tiny post I'm signing off for the rest of the week. I've cookies to bake and presents to wrap and a giant turkey to wrestle.

My warmest wishes to all of you and my best hopes for a wonderful holiday; what ever holiday you celebrate. See you on Monday, December 27th.

Excuses

There are days when writing is tricky. There are days when writing is inspired. Then there are days like today when writing is near to impossible!

I've got a full schedule today; in fact I'll be driving for more than three hours this afternoon. I've errands to run, groceries to buy, and oh yes, some big holiday coming up next week.

Adding to the merriment is the fact I'm also busy coughing up a lung right now. I have the mother of the mother of all colds. Imagine trying to blow your nose while you're at the wheel. This will be my afternoon.

As for now, I'm going to stop coughing at my monitor and sign off this post. Hopefully, I'm back on Monday feeling bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. Have a wonderful weekend everyone.

Special Occasions

At this time of year, everyone is rushing about preparing or celebrating some sort of holiday. Special dishes are prepared and far-flung families reunite around the table. It's the perfect setting for any number of stories which is why so many writers use special occasions as the impetus for their plots.

I've used this device many, many times. I've had mysteries taking place around someone's birthday or anniversary. One of my plays takes place at a high school graduation, one at a pre-Oscar party.

Special occasions can bring together people of various backgrounds who all have one thing in common. Old rivalries can flare. Old loves can be revisited. New loves can blossom. Everyone is supposed to be on their best behaviour, but what happens when a few glasses of champagne have been ingested?

I like writing plots that give a firm reason for these people to know each other and a special occasion raises the emotional stakes. For example: A wedding. A time of joy but also a time of stress and huge expectations. For every ten people with tears in their eyes as they relive their own happy love stories there's someone who's reliving a bad relationship and feeling bitter. The ideas for plot lines are endless!

Gathering people for any event gives the writer the opportunity to have characters with long personal histories. Everyone knows everyone in their high school class. Strangers aren't going to be invited to a birthday party (although unexpected house guests can be fun). Imagine yourself as the new boyfriend or girlfriend at a family event. Are you instantly accepted or do you feel they eyes of judgment upon you? It would be an interesting POV.

One of the reasons I use special occasions so often is that everyone can identify with the situation. Not all of us have been to dinner with royalty, but we've all had birthdays. The reader has to get to know all the characters and their quirks fairly quickly. Why not give them a familiar situation?

Consider the wealth of writing opportunities offered by special occasions. It's a great gift for any writer.

Clear Thinking

I've been struggling with a vicious head cold this week and it's got me pondering about the art of thinking clearly. It's difficult to achieve this when your head feels as if it's stuffed full of cotton balls, but how can you write if you don't have a plan? Furthermore, how clearly do your characters think?

As a writer, I have to know where I'm going. I need to know the main points of my plots before I start to write. I know what information has to come out when; I can't imagine just sitting down and writing. I need some sense of order, some sense of control. I have to think clearly.

Some characters are naturally clear-thinkers. You can strand them in a pelting rainstorm with leaky shoes and they'll still find their way to shelter. Other characters will sit down and cry. Others will worry about how much they paid for the shoes that are now leaking.

Clear-thinking characters are often the main players. Their decisiveness and less emotional natures make them wonderful plot-pushers. They are concerned with action, not reaction. Usually highly intelligent, these characters are not easily fooled. I try to give my clear-thinkers some sort of Achilles heel to make them more identifiable. Perhaps they have a thing about finishing the crossword every morning within a certain time or perhaps they have to stir their coffee five times before they drink it. Maybe they have a favourite mug. Even clear-thinkers aren't robots (unless you're writing science fiction, in which case, maybe they are!)

I would think it would be incredibly irritating to have the crier as a main character. Wouldn't any reader get fed up and start imagining whacking the poor thing with a heavy shovel? Overly emotional characters can be exhausting; sooner or later you want them to just grow up and behave. Of course, there are those characters that overreact. But why do they overreact? Is it plausible or is it a case of 'pay attention to me'? I tend to put my emotional characters in supporting roles as I have found a little goes a long way.

The character who's concerned about their shoes could be described as a combination of the two previous types. On the one hand, he's clear-thinking enough to be aware of money he's just thrown away since the leaky shoes are obviously of inferior workmanship. On the other hand, he's upset a pair of shoes have been ruined. What if they were his favourite shoes? What if they were his lucky shoes? What if the pair of shoes were a gift from someone near and dear? This is the type of character I tend to make a main character. Sometimes clear thinking, sometimes emotional. I find them more human and thus easier both to write and to relate to.

Are your characters clear-thinkers? Are they criers? Or are they worried about the leakiness of their shoes?

Return of the Sheep

Sheep #1: We're baaaack.

Guardian: I just got the brain cleaned up after your last visit. Who knew that sheep shed?

Sheep #2: We did.

Guardian: Why are you back?

Sheep #1: Conflict.

Guardian: You don't have enough?

Sheep #2: We're sheep. Of course we're conflicted. Who's going to lead, who's going to follow, it's a power struggle.

Sheep #1: It's the writer. She's worried about conflict.

Guardian: I thought everything was going so well.

Sheep #2: Well, you were wrong. She's having a struggle with internal versus external conflict.

Guardian: We're back to the car chases and maniacs lurking in the attic, aren't we?

Sheep #1: That's right. Is it enough for a story to have its conflict takng place within each character and between characters? Is psychological conflict sufficient? Or do you have to throw in the equivalent of car chases and people rushing about lugging meat cleavers?

Guardian: Some of the best books involve psychological conflict.

Sheep #2: Yes, but those are important books. Books dealing with the riddle of life and the ultimate triumph of the human spirit. Literary fiction. She's writing a mystery. Completely different genre.

Sheep #1: Don't get us wrong. We love mysteries. We love well written mysteries. But can she write this type? Will it work?

Guardian: I'm confused. She just read her draft and was quite pleased. I know. I felt the grin.

Sheep #2: She's conflicted. Ironic isn't it?

Guardian: What's the plan?

Sheep #1: We're just going to frolic about for a bit. Maybe jump a few fences. Usually if we show up she figures it out.

Sheep #2: I'd recommend keeping a watchful eye. Knives and speedy roadsters could be making an appearance.

Sheep #1: I've never driven before.

Sheep #2: Maybe that will be enough conflict.

With Thanks

I posted my 100th post last week and I thought I should give a little back to all of you who give me so very much.

Monday morning. Again. Time to make my blogging circuit and discover what's on other writers' minds. I realized a while ago how much I've come to count on this wonderful online world of writers. I love reading all of your blogs and experiencing how each of you approach your craft. I've enjoyed learning what I have in common with many of you, and what makes me stand alone in a corner.

It's been said many times, but it bears repeating because it's true. Writing is a lonely business. I don't have a writing partner (I can't see myself doing well in such a relationship). I write alone. Admittedly, I have two cats who stalk by and occasion and seem to judge me. Harshly. But most of the time it's just me and the laptop ( and it seems to have very little to say).

This is my thank you to all of you who have been kind enough to include me on your own blog circuit. I so appreciate all of your comments; some of which have made me laugh, some of which have made me smile; all of which have made me think.

I can't imagine not being in touch now that I've entered this world. It's comforting to know as I sit here tapping away that so many of you around the world are tapping away as well.

I wish you all inspired plots, fascinating characters and blockless writing. Thank you all.

Conversation

"What is the use of a book," thought Alice, "without pictures and conversation?"

There aren't many books with pictures unless you include children's books and coffee table books; but almost every work of fiction has to have conversation which means the writer has got to get his/her head around writing realistic dialogue.

I've had an odd journey in this discipline. Way back, when the world was young, I wrote a great many plays (all awful, I'm sure). I wrote them specifically so my class could do a play every year. I wrote so I could act. Later, I wrote several duologues for drama festivals; again so I could act. I never paid that much attention to the fact I was writing; it was just a necessary step so I could get my feet onto a stage.

When I started writing my mystery games, my first commission was for a play. I was paralyzed with fright. By this time, I had acted for years and had said some of the best dialogue ever written. Who was I to think that I could write dialogue? I muddled through, gritting my teeth and was pleasantly surprised by the finished product. My customer told me the play was a big success. I still wasn't comfortable writing dialogue. I hadn't learned to trust my acting instincts would start to scream if a line was wrong. Over time (I've written one more play and many games with 'scripted' clues) I've learned to trust.

Writing dialogue is now one of the easiest things for me to do; in fact my WIP is very dialogue-driven. I know each of my characters so well that putting words into their mouths isn't a problem. I know their rhythms and their vocabulary. I've learned to write conversations without the annoying dialogue tags but still be able to differentiate between the two conversationalists. If a third or fourth person enters the conversation then the tags start to appear.

Any writer writes with their own voice, but each character must have their own voice too. I admire writers who can create characters who use identifying phrases (Hercule Poirot and his little grey cells) and who make their characters come alive through their words rather than by description.

It may be my theatrical and debating history, but I've always been interested in what people say and how each of us choose to phrase it. Get ten people together on a sunny day and all ten will describe the day differently. Vocabulary choices reveal so much; education, history, personal prejudices to name a few.

Every character in any book is there for a specific purpose. Let each of them speak with their own voice. Your work will be richer and more realistic. Do they stutter? Do they have the unfortunate habit of dropping a malaprop? Remember as you write; these characters aren't you, they need their own voice.

When You Write, Get it Right

Warning! This is a rant!

I love to read historical fiction. Love it. However, one of my pet peeves is when the writer gets the history wrong. I have no problem with historical 'maybe's, but I have massive problems when known history gets played with for the sake of a plot.

For example: It's possible Queen Elizabeth I and Mary, Queen of Scots met. It's possible. There was a time when they were in the same part of England and Elizabeth did have a habit of riding off and people not knowing where she was. Did she meet Mary? No one knows...but it's possible. Were they best friends? No. Would they have gotten along? Probably not. People are people after all, regardless of the date. Elizabeth was ruled by her head, Mary was ruled by her heart. Usually these people do not see eye to eye.

People have been writing books against a panoply of great historic events for a long, long time. That's great. But get the history right. Get the dates right. Don't have people meeting in a building that wouldn't be built for another 100 years, or one that was destroyed 50 years earlier (examples of both I've read recently). Don't write anachronisms. Do your research. Were they writing with quills, or were fountain pens in regular use? How much food would regularly be served at a meal, and what kind of food? Central heating is a fairly recent invention, don't have characters flitting through corridors dressed in nothing but wisps of chiffon in an English winter. They'd freeze.

Don't get me started on the current television series The Tudors. In my opinion, Tudor history is interesting enough without having to add things.

I recently watched a television movie about the Duke and Duchess of Windsor and the events leading up to the abdication. This is one of my subjects; I think I may have read almost every book on the subject, including autobiographies and letters. I watched the interview with the screenwriter before I watched the movie and I was encouraged. She'd done her research and certainly talked very knowledgeably about the subject. I then watched the movie and ground my teeth when there was a historical error 2 minutes into it. Now, I realize that this particular story would have to be condensed for a movie. But, couldn't the events be condensed correctly?Case in point: Their first meeting was mentioned correctly, but their second meeting was wrong. Grrrrr.

This same credo must hold, surely, for writing in any period. If you're mentioning current events, then get them right. Get the date right. Get the cell phone right. If you're writing in a time that can only be described vaguely as 'now' then don't call attention to world events or (what is now) up-to-the-minute technology.

Historical fiction is called that for a reason. There's obviously fiction. But get the history right. If you're going to use real people as characters then do your research. Learn their speech patterns from letters. Of course, things will get made up; no one can tell what Churchill and King George VI said to each other during their first meeting, but get the date of the meeting right.

Okay, rant ended.

Do you read historical fiction? Do historical inaccuracies bother you or do you get swept up into the story and not really care?

TIme Management

It's here. That dreaded time of year when there doesn't seem to be enough hours in the day. There are times when I feel as if I'm sprinting from the moment my feet hit the floor beside my bed until I tuck myself under my blankets at night. So much to do and so little time!

I admit I am not one of those people who have their Christmas shopping done by August. I'm just not. When it's August, it's summer and I'm thinking about going to the beach or on holiday or making jam. I'm not thinking about Christmas.

I'll even deny the ever-nearing date after I've turned the calendar to December. Come on, it's only the 1st or the 2nd! I've got plenty of time. Add to the mix that there are several December birthdays in my household (not to mention my grown daughter's birthday on the 20th) so my baking has to include birthday cakes. And presents. I believe December birthdays deserve just as much attention as birthdays in any other month.

So with the baking, the decorating and the shopping, when in the name of holy socks am I supposed to be finding time to write? I can't write in the middle of the night. I could, of course, but I tend to get cranky if not down right ornery if I have to exist on only a few hours of sleep. I'm not 22 anymore. On the other hand, I really want to get my WIP to the point of revisions. Really, really, really. And no, I can't write 5,000 words a day. I am not that gifted.

Who has tips for me so that I can still be holding onto my sanity when January comes around?

Faces

I have a file of pictures I use while I'm writing. They are pictures of buildings, trees, views, flowers, etc. I have many, many pictures of rooms. Strangely, I don't have any pictures of people.

When I first started writing seriously five or so years ago I would always find pictures of people I would use as jumping-off points for my characters. I know of many authors that swear by this technique, but I don't do it any more. I find it too limiting.

I need to look at pictures of rooms for details. What does the ceiling look like? How is the furniture situated? What kind of fabric is used? Remember; I write stories happening 70 years ago in a country I don't live in. The internet and picture books are my telescope to the past. I can look at old menus; read books written in the period, look at pictures of old automobiles. I look at lists of what music was popular, what plays were being performed, etc. But faces? No, no, no!

I do have pictures of people, but for the clothes. How narrow are the belts? How big are the hats? What style are the shoes? What colours are the most prevalent? Actually, I have a fairly comprehensive knowledge about clothes (I was a costume designer at one point), so most of these pictures are for confirmation that my knowledge is correct.

I don't want faces. I have the faces in my head and I want readers (if I ever have any) to make up their own pictures. I'll say if someone's got curly hair if it's a character note (for the character or for someone else). I'll mention someone being exceptionally tall or short. I'll talk about the wart which she tries to hide. Someone could talk about someone's blue eyes or extremely long eye lashes. Physical similarities are also mentioned. But I'm not copying anyone's face. These characters aren't based on anyone and I don't want anyone's face on them; even if it's only in my head.

How important are pictures to you when you're writing? Do you refer to them constantly? Do you have pictures of your characters?

Senses

Every writer exposes their readers to the setting(s) of their stories. It could be a charming English village or a busy city. It could be a farm or a mountain cabin high in the Alps. Stories can take place anywhere and it's our job to make the reader's experience as rich a one as possible.

I believe all five senses should be invoked when possible. The house may be sparkly clean, but can you smell the scent of wood-polish? Does the eye-watering aroma of bleach greet everyone as they come through the door? Has someone been baking; and if they have, was the baking successful? The smell of fresh bread or cooking wafting in the air is wonderful, but consider the comedic possibilities of baking gone wrong. Any character is going to be in a foul mood if they've just burnt something; not to mention their embarrassment at having someone show up at their door to witness their failure.

Every writer will tell the reader what a setting looks like, but have each character notice different things. A person with back trouble will be horrified at the prospect of a room filled with cushy furniture. A tall person is going to duck through doorways and have trouble sitting in a regular sized chair. An art critic (or someone who claims to be) will immediately notice the art (if any) on the walls and the social lion will see nothing but the decor.

Is it quiet or is there the unsettling skitter of mice in the walls? Is there the staccato of rain against a tin roof? Is there music playing and if there is, what kind? Musical taste can be a wonderful indication of character and a tool for revealing hidden depths. Have a teenager mesmerized by opera or a white-haired matron bouncing to hip-hop. Your characters just became real.

The sense of touch should also be utilized. Is that cushion really as soft as it looks, or is the material scratchy? Sitting on a bale of hay is not the same as sitting on a feather bed. Remember the smoothness of the banister or the roughness of a kitten's tongue as he gives your characters a friendly lick.

Last but not least, let the reader experience the wonder of Aunt Hilda's famous lemonade; maybe it's famous for another reason than what one would expect! Maybe your character lives for his morning cup of coffee or is always crunching peanuts. What would happen if someone is forced to eat something they don't like or something unfamiliar? Opportunities abound.

Try to use every sense. The more real we make our characters' world the more real we make our characters.

Reading

I've discovered I read differently now I'm writing. Once I would simply open a book and read. Now I open a book and analyze.

I pay attention to the beginning: Is the first sentence dialogue? Is it throwing me right into the middle of the action? Or is it what I term a 'soft' beginning where I'm introduced to the characters and start to learn about their particular quirks?

I take note of dialogue: How is it written? How many dialogue tags are there and what are they? Does the author use 'said' or 'says' or are many characters hissing and whispering? Can I easily discern which character is talking and if I can, why can I? Is it vocabulary choices? Different rhythms?

Descriptive passages get my attention as well; what vocabulary is being used? Can I easily imagine the setting? How often are other senses invoked other than sight? I relish books that allow me to smell the cooking or feel the pinch of a new pair of shoes. How much time is spent describing the settings is also interesting. If I'm reading a book that bounces from place to place then I want a description of each location so when the story returns there I know where we are. If the book takes place in one location then let me know the layout, especially if it's a mystery.

POVs also capture my interest. How many are there? Is one character more dominant than the others? Is there one character that seems particularly quiet and if there is, why is that? I've read several books where the protagonist is written in the first person and the rest of the POV characters are written in the third.

Lastly, I look at the thickness of the book and take a moment to appreciate how long it took the author to actually write the sucker. I just finished a book with a page count of over 1,4oo. My brain fries at the time it must have taken to write. I happen to know that this particular author had the cover of the book design delivered while the book was still being written upstairs on her computer. Can you imagine the horror? Obviously, she finished it by her deadline, but that must have been a chilling moment.

I still can get swept away by a great story, but part of my mind is analyzing why I'm getting swept away. I pay attention to the plot's pace. Does it begin with a flurry and then slow to a snail's pace? Is the ending rushed? I read a book this week with a rushed ending and my first thought was "Ah, the deadline approacheth..."

Do you read books differently now? I look at every book and think "What can I learn from this?" How about you?

Once Upon a Middle

Every writer learns the importance of your manuscript having a good 'hook'. Your first sentence is supposed to dazzle. Your first paragraph should astound. By then end of the first page a reader should be drooling in anticipation to turn the page. Fine and dandy.

Endings are also obviously important. Does everyone live happily ever after? Are those who are evil suitably punished and those who are good suitably rewarded? Every writer makes his/her own decision, but all know to tie up (at least) the main plot line. It's fine (maybe even good) for a reader to wonder what happens next, but no one is left unsatisfied. Everyone will close the book and heave a pleasurable sigh.

But what about the middle? You're past the beginning, all the characters have been introduced, each with their own issues, and the plot lines are well underway. But, you're nowhere near the end. How do you keep things moving along at a nice trot without racing?

This is the part of any project where most writers (including me) seem to run into trouble. Since I write mysteries I worry about giving away too much too soon, or not dropping enough clues early on. Subplots are great, but I don't want them taking too much focus away from the main storyline. Subplots are great for humour, or for concentrating on one character's foibles, but I believe they should all serve the main plot in some capacity.

The trick is have the plot's path take some twists and turns but still be heading in the right direction. Many mystery authors throw in a few more dead bodies in the middle to keep the game afoot. Romance writers may add a few hiccups to their heroine's life; old boyfriend (or ex-husband) returns, new pet arrives on the doorstep, she earns a promotion at work, or takes on a new project. I have no problem with any of these as long as when I'm reading I don't think this plot just got thrown into the mix to add some steam.

How do you make your way through the middle? Is it full steam ahead as you whistle a happy tune or do you stand, arms akimbo, and puzzle 'what do I do now?'. You've got to get through the middle to get to the end. Do you stall or put your foot down even heavier on the gas pedal?Do you suffer from middle-mania?

Just Do It

It's the best advice one can give to any writer, and in my opinion, the hardest advice for any writer to follow. Just do it. Write. Sit yourself down at a table or at a computer desk or put your tablet of paper down on the nearest giant tortoise shell and write. Make words flow out of your pen and make the words into sentences, which become paragraphs which become chapters which become a complete manuscript. Hey, presto.

The first trick is finding time; because (for me, at least) I can always find something else to do. There are days when the prospect of cleaning out my refrigerator is a more delightful idea than sitting down and writing. Non-writers cannot understand this. "How lovely," they say, "you can spend your days writing. How creative! How fulfilling!" I don't want to shatter their dreams and say that some days it's just "How painful!" I can tell if my writing is going to go well because there's an urge to get my fingers dancing across the keyboard before the words and phrases that are sparkling in my head dissolve into the murky back recesses of my consciousness. I know I'm going to get the next unit done and I may even go further. It's possible for me to write for a few hours before my pace starts to splutter and my fingers become too busy typing typos.

Writers come in all guises, but all of us have responsibilities outside of our writing. It's very easy to allow those responsibilities to take first place and say "I've no time to write today. I've got to get whatever done." It's a simple shift of priorities that affects no one but ourselves. Of course we'll meet our deadline, but we're simply not writing today. We'll write tomorrow. All's well with the world.

There are those writers (how I wish I were one) who will write on and on and not particularly care about the quality of the writing, it's getting to the end of the manuscript that counts. After all, they rationalize, that's what self-editing is for. That's what second, third and fourth drafts are for. Just get to the end and then the real work will begin. I simply can't work this way; trust me, I've tried. If I'm not liking what I'm writing, if the rhythm is wrong or the vocabulary is stale I simply cannot keep going. I have to fix it. I have to figure out what's wrong. For me, there is no point in writing just to write because I know I'll be deleting it before the day is through. I am a very harsh judge of my own work. I like it when my writing makes me laugh, I like it when my writing makes me cry. I do not like it when my writing makes me angry.

Just do it. Sit down and write.

Malevolent Mud Makers

My thanks to Galen Kindley who inspired this post with the comment he left on my blog yesterday.

Observe the merry writer making her way down the forest path. Her pace is steady, her face wreathed with smiles. She has no idea she is being watched by a malevolent mud maker. But she is. They strike without warning. Without mercy. Slurp! Another writer stuck in the mud.

What is the mud? For me, mud is when I can't seem to move forward. Something is wrong. It could be a character. It could be a plot. It could be a combination of the two. Getting stuck means it's time to reevaluate and plan my way out; since the only other option is being stuck and never moving on. How do I accomplish this?

Characters: Every writer has to know their characters. You have to see the world through their eyes and feel their hearts quicken. You must walk in their shoes, have their memories and their expectations. You know their fondest desires and their deepest fears. Mud can occur when you've forgotten this and you've written your character incorrectly. It's easy to do, one can get so caught up in plot that characters become puppets instead of people. Go back to a point in your manuscript which is mud-free and see where the mud begins. Has a character become a puppet?

Plot: Every writer juggles several plots during the writing of a book. There's the main story line, of course. But there are countless other subplots weaving their way through the story, each with its own agenda and its own purpose. Malevolent mud makers appear when one of these plots go astray. The timeline could be awry. The plot goes in a circle instead of in a line. Worst of all is the realization there's no reason for the plot. Malevolent mud makers love plots that don't accomplish anything. Take a harsh look at your manuscript. Are you harboring a plot that is simply taking up space for the sake of taking up space? You've got mud, my friend.

Beware of malevolent mud makers as you continue down your path. Ignore them at your peril. Avoiding them is preferable, but even the best of us can be taken in by their wiles. If you do look down and see mud on your boots, know there is always a way out. It may be a quick fix, it may take time. But you will be mud-free and able to move ahead.

Have you encountered the malevolent mud makers? How did you get unstuck?