Fun Friday

1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Circumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.

3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.

4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.

5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

6. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

7. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

8. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

9. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. Steve is looking into it.

10. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

11. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

12. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said 'No change yet.'

13. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

14. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

15. A backward poet writes inverse.

16. In a democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.

17. Don't join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects!